Chapter Outline 9th Edition
- Introduction.
- Leslie Baxter and Barbara Montgomery study the intimate communication of close relationships.
- They quickly rejected the idea of discovering scientific laws that order the experience of friends and lovers.
- They were struck by the conflicting tensions people face in relationships.
- They believe that social life is a dynamic knot of contradictions.
- Their theory on romantic relationships parallels work on friendship and family systems.
- The basic premise is that personal relationships are a ceaseless interplay between contrary or opposing tendencies.
- Relational dialectics highlight the tensions in close personal ties.
- The tug-a-war dialectics of close relationships.
- Contradiction is a core concept of relational dialectics.
- Contradiction refers to the dynamic interplay between unified oppositions.
- Every personal relationship faces the tension between intimacy and independence.
- Paradoxically, bonding occurs in both interdependence with and independence from the other.
- Baxter and Montgomery draw heavily on Mikhail Bakhtin.
- Bakhtin saw dialectical tension as the deep structure of all human experience.
- Unlike Hegelian or Marxist dialectical theory, Bakhtin's oppositions have no oltimate resolution.
- Dialectical tension provides opportunity for dialogue.
- To avoid the anxiety Westerners experience with paradox, Baxter used terms such as the tug-of-war in her research interviews.
- Relational dialectics, is not referring to being of two minds—the cognitive dilemma within the head of an individual who is grappling with conflicting desires. Instead she’s describing the contradictions that are located in the relationship between parties.
- Dialectical tension is the natural product of our conversations
- Baxter and Montgomery believe that these contradictions are inevitable and can be constructive.
- Three dialectics that affect relationships.
- Although other theories emphasize closeness, certainty, and openness, people also seek autonomy, novelty, and privacy.
- Conflicting forces in relationships aren't reducible to either/or decisions.
- Their research has focused on three overarching dialectics: integration-separation, stability-change, and expression-nonexpression.
- Dialectical tensions exist within a relationship (internal) and between a couple and their community (external).
- There is no finite list of relational dialectics.
- Integration and separation.
- This tension is a primary strain in all relationships.
- If one side prevails, the relationship loses.
- Within their social network, this tension is felt as inclusion pulling against seclusion.
- Stability and change.
- Baxter and Montgomery acknowledge the need for both interpersonal certainty and novelty.
- In the couple’s relationship with others, this dialectic takes the form of conventionality versus uniqueness.
- Expression and nonexpression.
- The pressures of openness and closedness wax and wane like phases of the moon.
- A couple also faces the revelation and concealment dilemma of what to tell others.
- RDT 2.0: Drilling down on Bakhtin’s concept of dialogue.
- Baxter’s early emphasis with Montgomery was on contradictory forces inherent in all relationships.
- She now refers to the second generation of the theory as RDT 2.0.
- Baxter has increasingly focused on the relational implications of Mikhail Bakhtin’s conception of dialogue.
- Baxter highlights five dialogical strands within Bakhtin’s thought. Without dialogue, there is no relationship.
- Dialogue as constitutive—relationships in communication
- This dialogical notion is akin to the core commitments of Symbolic Interactionism and Coordinated Management of Meaning in that communication creates and sustains the relationship.
- A constitutive approach suggests that communication creates and sustains a relationship.
- Differences are just as important as similarities and both are created and evaluated through dialogue.
- Dialogue as utterance chain—building block of meaning
- An utterance is what a person says in one conversational turn.
- But, an utterance is embedded in an utterance chain of things heard in the past and responses anticipated in the future.
- Dialogue as dialectical flux.
- The contradictory forces are in an unpredictable, unfinalizable, and indeterminate process of flux.
- Rather than single binary contradictions, each relational force is in tension with every other pole.
- Two strategies to deal with the complexities include spiraling inversion and segmentation.
- Dialogue as an Aesthetic Moment.
- Dialogue can be “a momentary sense of unity through a profound respect for the disparate voices in dialogue.”
- A meaningful ritual can be an aesthetic moment for all participants because it’s a joint performance of normally competing and contradictory voices,
- Dialogue as a critical sensibility.
- Dialogue is obligated to critique dominant, oppressive voices.
- Baxter opposes any communication practice that ignores or gags another’s voice.
- Ethical reflection: Sissela Bok’s Principle of Veracity.
- Bok rejects an absolute prohibition of lying
- But she also rejects consequentialist ethics, which judge acts on the basis of whether we think they will result in harm or benefit.
- Her principle of veracity asserts that, “truthful statements are preferable to lies in the absence of special consideration.”
- Critique: Meeting the criteria for a good interpretive theory?
- Some scholars question whether relational dialectics should be considered a theory at all as it lacks prediction and explanation, and does not offer any propositions.
- Baxter and Montgomery agree and offer dialectics as a sensitizing theory.
- Relational dialectics should be evaluated based on the interpretive standards, on which it stacks up well.